So.........

In a weird mood. That's pretty normal for me though. I guess being in a "normal" mood would be really weird for me! Kinda feel like I need a change in my life........not sure what, but I'm bored! Need a change!

"We both know you have to walk away,
But God knows I'm gonna love you anyway.
The lights turn red and the lights turn green;
The sun comes up and shines on everything,
Every day... Every day.
And I still don't know what to do about the way I feel about you.
Some things ain't ever gonna change........."

When I fall......

I walk along, alone every day.
I don't fit anywhere, I've changed in some way.
I'm tired of trying to not be alone;
Tired of trying to just be with someone.
At the end of the day, I just want to give in.
Let the darkness overtake me again.

Sometimes I do, sometimes I just fall;
Into a dark and empty place,
Where no one hears me call.
My mind drifts away as I lose all control.
And that's when I find you, I find you when I fall.

I run sometimes from everyone who cares.
I run as fast as I can and I get no where.
I ran to be alone, but I don't want to be.
You look in me, stay near me.
Just when I want to quit the fight,
You wrap your arms around me so tight.

Sometimes I do, sometimes I just fall;
Into a dark and empty place,
Where no one hears me call.
My mind drifts away as I lose all control.
And that's when I find you, I find you when I fall.

I'll never understand why I fight to be strong.
Scared to need you. Scared to love you.
But, I just need to let go...........

Time to listen up......

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and you know that the whole time you're talking, the other person is not listening at all and probably just trying to figure out what to say next? I've been there, a lot, and I've probably also been the other person as well. What about giving the answer of "Fine" when you're asked how you've been because you know the person asking doesn't want to hear the truth? Been there, done that.

Some people are just gifted listeners. I can be a good listener, but my ability is based on my mood and that's really hard for me to control. God has blessed me with several gifted listeners in my life. My mom is probably the best listener I have; even over the phone, she is completely involved in our conversations and it's awesome. I call her to talk about all kinds of stuff. I rehearse conversations with my momma! I know she'll be honest with me and give me good feedback. And she actually thinks about our conversations after we have ended them and calls with or texts other thoughts she has on the subject. Mom isn't the only gifted listener I know........I have a few more in my life and I am very thankful!

Have you ever noticed that it doesn't matter how many people are listening to you if one certain person isn't HEARING what you're saying? I tell my kids at the center to "turn your ears on" whenever I need their attention. It works great. Makes me wonder......should I start telling adults the same thing? Would it work? Because I really need you to hear me, to really hear me! Are you ready to listen?

Does God care about me?

Day 2 of VBS is complete! And tonight we learned about how much God cares for us. There are daily devotions that those of us leading VBS were asked to read each day. This morning, the devotion asked the question, "Does God care about me?". The author then said that it seemed like a silly question and that we all know the answer, but sometimes it's comforting to hear it again! Like, when I asked Caleb, Lilly, or Kaytlin if they love me; I know the answer, but it's really great to hear them say it!

I know without a doubt that God cares for me. He loves me so much, loves me enough to send His Son to die to pay my sin debt. But sometimes, it's really nice to be reminded of how God cares. I get so wrapped up in my life not going the way I want it to go, that I forget He has a perfect plan for my life. So, I don't have to worry! I don't have to adjust "the plan"; God has got that completely covered! What a relief!

Who Am I?

Well, this is Vacation Bible School week and I'm working with the 3yr old class. Tonight we learned about who we are in God's eyes. I could not help but smile as I sat and watched my class repeat, "I am wonderfully made". My class also learned that we were God's favorite of all creation.

Why is it that we don't dwell in the fact that we are the crown of God's creation? His work was not complete until He created us! And He created us just as we are!

Instead of seeing His beautiful creation, we see ears that stick out too far, hips that are too wide, a stomach that is not thin enough, a nose that's too big, hair that's too straight, etc. I am very tired of seeing myself the way the world sees me. I want to see myself and others through God's eyes.

One of those days.....

Today has been, well, not wonderful. Nothing happened that will make an eternal difference, but it has just been a rough day. I know that nothing can happen to me outside of God's plan, but I have felt very lost today.

My grandma was an amazing woman who taught me so much. And today I could hear her voice kind of singing one of her little lessons, "Feelings come and feelings go and feelings are deceiving.". Told you she was amazing. Very profound truth that is easily memorized.

So, I might be feeling lost and like my world is spinning too fast for me, but these are just feelings. Feelings hurt and injure me, but only if I give in. And if I was relying on my strength, I would have given in from the beginning. But, I'm relying on Christ's strength and His strength is perfect. His grace is sufficient and His power is made perfect in weakness.

There is a difference between wanting something and being obsessed with it. If something crosses your mind once or twice a day and you think, "It would be nice to have that", I don't think you've reached the obsession point. But, when you spend more than a couple thoughts on that something, and plan out ways to get that something each day, you are obsessed!



I struggle with being obsessed, daily! And the object of my obsession changes all the time. My obsession should be Christ, but I have to fight for that every minute, battling against my own nature. The way my obsession jumps from one thing to another drives me crazy! My mind is like an iPod that is constantly set on shuffle!

Okay, so the problem has been identified. How do I fix it? I don't. I can't on my own. But, I can daily (hourly, minutely, or whenever needed) submit to the Lord. Laying my problems at His feet and re-focusing my mind on Him; nothing else will do. It blows my mind that I even have the right to call on His name, let alone depend on Him for everything. Christ died and rose again to allow me that privilege. He took my place, paid for my sins, and bridged the gap between me and the Father! Hallelujah!

A Song for Kevin :)

:) :) :)
I know it's a country song, but you'll get over it!